Saturday, February 9, 2008

Tom Assaulted by Zany Bear - Film at 11

Tips Fans, a great injustice has been visited upon Section 119.

While innocently watching a fun-filled sporting event between two squads of eager lads, I was viciously, suddenly, and without provocation, attacked by a senseless beast. No, I don't mean Leo...it was Lincoln.

Long beloved as the Silvertips mascot, Lincoln has had his ups and downs. Though his high-energy introduction to each Tips game is usually flawless, he has been known to crash his ATV into the net or lose his footing when sliding to center ice. Of course, none of his "downs" competes with the night last season when he was lowered from the rafters. I swear I saw him mutter a prayer before that one.

But tonight, while the fair play continued on ice and the Everett Silvertips defeated the well-rounded squad from Prince George, that zany bear came to Section 119 and nearly mauled me.

As many of you know, I'm a quiet fan, content to enjoy a spirited game of competition; I only wish there was a way both teams could win. For an innocent person to be a victim of this savagery, well, it just makes you wonder what kind of world we live in.

If that wasn't enough, Lincoln returned minutes later to rub popcorn (laced with razor blades no doubt) in my face. I'm lucky to be alive. If I had a picture of a salmon on my t-shirt, I'm sure I wouldn't be here to write this blog post today.

So keep your eyes peeled, Section 119, because that isn't Yogi Bear out to steal a picnic basket. He missed his hibernation so he's angry...I only pray his next victim is as lucky as me.

1 comment:

silvertips chica said...

TOP TEN REASONS WHY HOCKEYTOM VENTED HIS WRATH ON LINCOLN:

10. yelled 'down in front' 9 times--didn't work

9. still upset after hearing fans shout 'fight' during national anthem

8. bought 500 50-50 tickets--and still lost

7. can't get a chuck a puck to clear the glass

6. bitter that he has yet to win a Judd and Black washer and dryer

5. heard that Lincoln was stumping for Hillary

4. devastated that Graham Potuer is still out of the lineup

3. suspected that Lincoln was really a T-birds fan disguised as our mascot

2. heard a rumor that Becanic has been nominated for coach of the year

1. from L.A.--was born annoyed